December 06, 2003

Anonymous Blogger talks about dating

My blog friend, Anonymous Blogger has recently been writing about dating. His most recent entry is about the excuses women give when they don't want to see him anymore.

So, to sum up:
1. "No chemistry" - a lame "excuse"
2. "Let's be friends" - a lie (unless actually followed up with communication)


I feel bad for the Anonymous Blogger because these are actually lies that people tell when they don't want to see someone again. But hopefully the following explanation will help to relieve some of his angst.

The above terms are part of this society's unwritten social code. This is language that everyone understands. I think people say these things because they just don't have the heart to say to someone, "THE TRUTH IS I JUST DON'T LIKE YOU." or "YOU'RE NOT GOOD LOOKING ENOUGH FOR ME." or "I JUST FIND YOU BORING AND I DON'T SEE THIS GOING ANYWHERE." in the case of "No Chemistry".

"Let's be friends" is the nice way to say, "You'll never hear from me again."

Having to reject someone, if you are a nice person, is just an absolutely aweful thing to do.

I would guess that if ANONYMOUS has been hearing "Let's be friends", he's probably been picking nice people to go out with.

I want to tell him that he should keep trying. Eventually, he'll hit it off with someone. Finding someone to be with romantically is just more challenging for some people, myself included. Some people have it easy and G-d bless them but others just seem to have a harder time.

Have faith. If there was someone out there for me, there definitely is someone out there for you.

I won't give you that lame advice like "JOIN AN ACTIVITY YOU ENJOY DOING SO YOU'LL MEET LIKE MINDED PEOPLE" which of course will eventually lead to romance according to the sages who espouse this wisdom. Actually, in my case it was true, but it took years of joining different activities before I actually found like minded people and was able to reap the social benefits.

I can only say, have patience. Everything works out in the end and that the FATES (those impetuous bitches) work in mysterious ways.

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