When I got home this evening I was prepared to write about Mayor Bloomberg's trip to Israel (point of that?); men's junk and how much room they have to make for it in the subway (you know that guy who has to spread his legs so far open to make room for his fantastically large genitalia that there is no room for a human woman's hips to fit into the space next to him), and my high school prom.
But I'm in a good mood and I don't feel like whining.
Don't worry. I'll get back to it. The Bloomberg thing has me a little peeved. Thank goodness he doesn't draw a salary as a mayor and thank goodness he flew on his private jet because I would've been majorly pissed if we were paying for this trip. When did he become a diplomat. I'm sure if all Jewish folk could go to Israel to express their sympathies that we wouldn't unless we all had family there. Perhaps he does have family there and that's why he went. Yeah...Okay....I can live with it if I convince myself he has family there otherwise it just doesn't make much sense.
This afternoon, I hung out with a good friend of mine. i rode the bus with her across town so she could pick up her child from summer camp. Next to me, on the bus was an average sized guy sitting with his legs as far apart as humanly possible, squishing me and my woman sized hips into my friend. I took a good look at him and could see no conceivable reason for this as his junk(or what I could of it through his pants anyway) seemed to be of normal size and distribution. I really think that some guys have an overexaggerated notion of the packages they are carrying. Needless to pointout that this does indeed ANNOY me.
My HS prom date was 2 inches shorter than me. He was a nice guy but we were kind of the last two people without dates (yeah, sad, isn't it?) and we decided to go together, DUTCH. My HS prom song was DON'T FORGET ABOUT ME. (it wasn't a good song then either). So, after paying for everything myself with a combination of my newspaper route, grocery store cashier, Baskin-Robbins counter person, money, I was surprised to learn weeks later that my date actually liked me in a romantic way. Sadly, I had to let him know that I did not return his feelings, which made me feel like crap, because there's never a nice way to reject somebody. I was also a little annoyed that he let me pay for everything since he liked me so much, so I guess it was a little bit of an FU too on some level.
The nice surprise of my prom was that he was a really good slow dancer. It turns out his mom was a dance instructor and he had been dancing for years and he made me look really good on the dance floor. The other great thing was staying out all night with my parent's permission. The next morning they surprised me by throwing a brunch before we all went on our after-the-prom GREAT ADVENTURE excursion. I was somehow tricked into go onto ROLLING THUNDER. All the way up the first incline I kept asking is this the coaster with the big drop and my friends kept saying no, until the big drop. I screamed the whole way and couldn't talk or breathe normally for about 10 minutes after walking away from the coaster. I haven't been on another one since. Otherwise, it was fine day spent with friends.
Whew!! I managed to get it all out anyway.
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