August 30, 2006

Flavor of Love 2 - Episode 4

Jelly on the Telly

One of the first shots we see at the beginning of Episode 4 is the silhouette of two roosters crowing. A few moments later Flav treats us with a poem. "After the elimination ceremony, what the heck. Got to my room. It was in full effect." Because after the ceremony Nibblz and Toasteee crawled into bed with Flav. Watching the three of them waking up together was beautiful (not really). Nibblz told the camera, "Me and my homegirl Toasteee woke up next to Flav. It was a wonderful feeling." But Toasteee told the camera "I wanna be with Flav but I don't wanna share him anytime - not the first time."

Back in the bedroom, with the benefit of subtitles, Nibblz lisped in Flav's ear, "I'm feeling that today is going to be an interesting day."

And she was right!

Big Rick delivered a Flava Gram telling the girls that they would be participating in a Dance Contest. And Flav told the camera "I need a girl who knows how to embrace my hip hop music." Because he wanted to make sure they could dance to his music on stage. Cut to archive footage of Brigitte Neilsen making a fool of herself on stage dancing to Flav's music.

Several moments later Flav introduced the girls to the three dance coaches there to help them prepare for the contest. One coach specialized in Hip Hop dancing, the second specialized in Krumping and the third was a break dancer. The women were broken up into three teams and the three women on the winning team were to win dinner, breakfast and lunch dates with Flav.

The first team was comprised of Buckeey, Beatuful and Toasteee. Krazy, Delishus and Nibblz made up the second team. The their team had like Dat, Buckwild, and Bootz. Naturally, there was a training montage. The women talked badly about each other to the camera while the viewer was treated to their rehearsals.

After the training the montage the girls were called on to compete.

And they all danced. And it all looked like they were doing the same things to me. And two teams were chosen for a standoff to break a tie breaker. The only woman who did anything different was Nibblz who gave Flav a lap dance during the standoff. She put her behind in Flav's face and according to the other women, she clapped her butt cheeks together. She admitted to the camera that she was a better stripper than dancer and was just relying on what she knew how to do best.

The team that was stacked with his three favorite women in the house won, which to me makes the whole dance off thing ridiculous. If he wanted to take out the three who won, why make the contestants go through all that crap. Anyway, Krazy won a dinner date for later that night, Nibblz was scheduled for breakfast and Deelishus was on the calendar for lunch.

The show jumped ahead to Krazy dressed in a beautiful black sequined gown and I have to admit, she looked really pretty. Flav told her he was taking her to his favorite place to eat and I think she understood that to mean that he was taking her some place fancy. If you guessed that his favorite place to eat is Kentucky Fried Chicken then your instinct was right. As Krazy was getting out of the limo you could tell that she was a little disappointed but that look was only there for a second. She quickly turned that look into a smile and we see her telling the camera that she was touched. It turns out that Flav rented the KFC for the night so they could have a private romantic dinner.

During dinner he questioned her about her level of attraction to him. Through gritted smiling teeth she told him that she was indeed attracted to him. But you could tell there was disgust behind that smile.

Up until this point in the show, we really hadn't seen too much of the women gossiping with each other and to tell you the truth, Krazy's date with Flav was starting to bore me. The producers must really understand their audience because from her on in the show starts getting really interesting.

Back at the house, the rest of the girls were hanging out. Some in the jacuzzi, some in the house. In the jacuzzi, Like Dat, Beatuful and Bootz were treated to the drunken rabble of Toasteee who claimed that while she and Nibblz were sleeping with Flav that Nibblz manipulated Flav's noonoo with her hand. Bootz was all ears as Like Dat called her out as a drunken liar.

Beatuful heard Flav pull up in front and we cut to Flav and Krazy in Flav's private hot tub. He toasted to their "finally having their moment" and then he pulled his swim trunks out of the tub and told Krazy that they were going to turn it up a notch. We then see the exterior of Flav's house and hear a sound track of kissing, slurping and giggling. Presumably Krazy and Flav are getting it on. It's my guess that he pulled out swim trunks while still wearing a pair of his own as a fakeout to the audience and that the soundtrack of giggling and slurping came from some other event.

The next morning, Nibblz got dressed for her breakfast date and her top was so revealing that VH1 blurred out parts of her top half. Flav claimed that her nipples were busting through but who knows. That could have been another fake out. It looked to me like she was wearing the same short white top she wore in the dance contest. Anyway their date went pretty well, I guess. They had a pretty frank conversation about Nibblz career as a stripper. She told Flav that she has a stripper pole in her living room and that she keeps up her stripping skills for internet stripping by dancing in strip clubs with friends. Flav was clearly impressed by her honesty. Or as he put it, kept it real.

Big Rick interrupted their date because it was over and he had to get ready for his lunch date with Deelishus.

The next time we see Flav he was descending his staircase with scepter in hand, dressed head to toe in red. He was wearing a red doo rag on his head. I thought he looked ridiculous but Deelishus was impressed because his outfit matched her red tee shirt. He actually took her on a romantic date. Deelishus and Flav picked strawberries. While picking the sensuous fruit, Deelishus referred to Flav as Daddy. That made my skin crawl a little bit. Over a spaghetti picnic Flav broke the romantic moment by telling Deelishus that he had feelings for both her and Krazy.

Back at the house the shit was hitting the fan. Bootz told Nibblz that Toasteee said what she said about Nibblz doing the thing that I won't name. Nibblz confronted Toasteee and expressed disappointment because, as she told Toasteee, of all the girls in the house that she had to worry about her talking behind her back , Toasteee was the last one she thought she had to worry about.

Nibblz armed with every last one of Toasteee's secrets, spilled the beans about her to Flav in his room after he got back from his date with Deelishus. She told Flav that Toasteee had appeared in porn. Flav then went to Toasteee and asked her if that was true. She denied it - naturally. Then Flav went back to Nibblz to make sure she was being truthful and called her back to his room for more information about Toasteee's past. While that meeting was going Toasteee knocked on Flav's door and with both women sitting there, he told them he was going to some research and whoever was caught lying, he said would be going home.

The she said, she said continued.

At the elimination ceremony, Flav called Toasteee out as a liar and produced a nasty photograph of Toasteee doing something nasteee. It was so nasteeee in fact, that the other women were shocked. This is no small feet considering that with the exception of Like Dat, they are all involved in adult entertainment in one form or another.

Toasteee went home in tears.

Now, I did some research myself and found out there are links to the porn that Nibblz was referring to but I'm not listing that on my website. This is also why I'm not repeating the names of the projects that Toastee was involved in.

You'll have to get that information on your own.

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