Episode 2 - Flav is Blind
This was a special, special show. It started with Flav's butler bringing a menu to the girls poolside. The women had to pick something off the menu they thought Flav would like. When the exotic but not really that exotic items were read aloud, you could see the look of confusion on their faces. Tiramisu, foie gras, and escargot were only some of the vocubulary words that weren't in their every day verbal repertoire.
So. . .after the girls got ready, they were transported to a restaurant on a party bus specially outfitted with a bar and stripper pole. The girls were quick to put it to good use. I think some of the women on the show might be actual strippers, porn stars and exotic dancers. Toastee - who was nicknamed such for her constant state of wastedness - wasn't wearing any underwear when she did her stripper split.
After the women were settled in the restaurant, Flav was brought in blind folded. The women were each sitting at a table with the dish they selected. Their job was to - actually I'm not sure what they were supposed to do. But it involved describing to Flav the various food items in front of him while he was blind folded so he could get a feel for their personalities.
The winners of this test were Like Dat, Buckwild and Tiger.
Are you wondering what their prize could have been? I thought you might be. Flav took the winners to some pier where two Gondolas were waiting. Two women would ride in one while Flav rode with the third and then switch out giving each a chance to impress Flav individually. Nothing especially memorable happened except for one thing. Flav kept calling the Gondolas - gonzoliers. Oh yeah and the third woman wouldn't kiss Flav because she didn't want to kiss him after he was kissing other women. High standards indeed.
On the bus ride home, sour grapes all the way, especially from Payshintz, who was drunkenly ranting about how she didn't need this drama and that she didn't need to stay here to be treated like crap when she could go back to Hong Kong and be treated like a princess. I mention this because it comes up in a later episode.
Back at the house, after the dates, Flav had one-on-one time with each of the remaining women. The one on ones involved the usual small-talk jibber-jabber.
"I'm just so grateful to be here."
"Well. I'm grateful that you are here."
"You know what I'm saying."
"Yeah, I know what you're saying."
One of the women just couldn't wait her turn and started hovering near the patio where he was having his one-on-ones. Wire. Wire was acting pretty nutty. When it was her turn to talk with Flav she asked him to touch her hair because it felt like silk and gave him cause for concern. Although in her camera confession after their date, she describes having felt every emotion ther is to feel. Wire did not receive a clock that evening during the "you know what time it is" ceremony. Neither did Spunkeey who was finally "flushed out" as a fake (in a room full of fakes by the way).
Other highlights include the incredibly caucasian Wire saying to a full room that she hopes Flav picks her because she wants to have dark babies. Not only is it offensive to just about everybody but it shows Wire is not terribly sensitive to the the people around her or aware of her surroundings for that matter. Also, it seems that Like Dat is sniffing out Buckwild as a fake. Buckwild is a white woman who speaks with a blaccent and claims to be from the "hood" or the "ghetto". But some of the other women on the show are starting to get suspicious. And Somethin' is getting a lot of shit for - well - shitting on Flav's floor.
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